Dear self,
It’s understandable that I have felt lost during this life I am currently living. The bridges which guide me have often collapsed which result in me descending into internal passivity. It’s understandable that I have developed these struggles as an outcome to all the grief, anguish, social affliction and personal traumas I have been exposed to. And there’s no doubt that this has left me to be victimised by my own psychological oppressions.
In the past I have coped by mutilating myself as a means to numb or dampen down the dejection I seemed to not be able to escape from. But I also deprived my body from nourishment due to it having a destined fatality. However as a result to this I have had to learn from the consequences they led to such as me being detained in a psychiatric unit but also how it put strain on my family’s relationship with each other.Through my moments of fragility, I have learned to embrace my past and see it as a significant battle I am surviving. My compassionate self would remind me of how “life is like a camera so focus on the best bits; capture the good times, see things from different viewpoints, develop from the negatives and if things don’t turn out well, take another shot”.
I have evolved as a person through my experiences. I am proud of my resilience to not giving up and proud of my insight to life I have been enlightened to which helps me to empathise with others. Despite everything that’s happened, my families loyalty and support truly kept me afloat and I am so grateful for the faith they have in me and have had in me continuously.
Some days I will feel vulnerable and have blips but I know that these are not set backs. Recovery isn’t linear, and it’s okay if all I did in a day was survive. After all, even the worst days only have 24 hours.
Keep fighting, allow yourself to blossom and never forget how valuable you are.
All my love,
Katie xx