For years I thought that being skinny was my goal, that I needed it to be accepted. That was something I told myself every day as well as my head.
However, sometimes being skinny is not the only reason someone starves themselves or purge or binge (depends on the person). Sometimes it's just because you think you don't deserve to have that food. You starve yourself completely aware of what it will bring you but you just keep going.
Personally, it was hard to accept that I needed to take care of myself again when all I taught and said to myself for years was exactly the opposite.
I tried to stay focused on things that would come with recovery. Relearn every aspect of a "normal" life and rediscover who I was outside of anorexia.Â
It's scary because ED's become your whole identity without you realising it. However, we need to keep in mind that that is just one thing, there is so much more and starting the journey to discover ourselves is so much worth than fighting day after day against food.
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