You are worth it @livin.isa

Ever since my eating disorder started, I've felt like it wasn't bad enough. I've hidden it for a long time but I knew I wanted to open up. I knew I didn't want to live like this. One night I had the courage to tell my mom. I stumbled with words and couldn't form one right sentence, but she got the message. When we realized how bad it was I decided to go see a psychologist and my doctor suggested a dietician too. After a few weeks I could join a therapy. To be honest, that didn't help me at all and only made things worse. I was having a really hard time but no one realized how much I was actually struggling. I've had to do everything myself. I had some help, but never a lot. I never got admitted to hospital, or went inpatient, I've never been tube fed. But I'm still worth recovery. I deserve it, not because I've been almost dead, not because I'm the sickest. But because I deserve to live.

I've always felt really fake and attention seeking, I sometimes still regret that I've opened up, But then I realize what would've happened if I didn't. My life would've been taken away even more, I wouldn't have been able to go on holiday or compete. I maybe wouldn't even be alive anymore...

You are allowed to recover, you're not fake, you aren't attention seeking, you are worth it. And it's okay if you have to open up yourself, or have never been underweight or any of the things. You still deserve recovery!

@livin.isa on instagram